Forgive me fellow CiK members for I am going to make an off-topic low quality post. I need to do this to get this lingering thoughts out of my mind once and for all.
I respected Roosh as a teacher, enlightener, and a shepherd. I have gained uncountable knowledge in almost all aspects of my life by reading/watching his works, his books, and his forum. I still cannot believe that a man who lives on the other side of the world that I never met, is having so many positive impacts in my personal development. In my eyes Roosh is the modern day incarnation of Saint Sava of Serbia.
But here is
one (and only this one) complaint that I'm going to vent (the purpose of this post)....
Since the start of Roosh's turns to faith he explicitly banned talks of fornication from his forum. Not only that but many members who made threads/posts which asked about improving relationships with the opposite sex will not long after get their threads locked with the reasons being:
- This is not a dating forum
- Secular advice are not welcome here
- Ask your priest
Also on many of Roosh's articles he wrote many things praising celibacy and self-denial even for layman who are not monks. I recall in one of his fictional story of Seraphim and Elena, the protagonist Seraphim in the end became a celibate and Elena married Seraphim's friend.
Because I venerated Roosh as a great teacher, I took his new outlooks on life and writings to heart. Teacher knows best and wishes the best for us, I thought. From 2020 to mid 2023 I prayed to God so that one day I can have spouse. I prayed and prayed without doing any other thing (because doing anything except praying is secular). At this time my real world effort is minimum (did not attend social events, lifting weights and doing sports at the bare minimum, did not have hobby, etc). Avoid secular things at all costs, and only trust God.
Until in June 2023 I met my friend who I did not see for a year. When we are deep in conversations, at one moment the conversation came to a topic of celibacy. My friend reminded me that our own parish's priest is married and not a celibate. He also reminded me to network with more people to increase the odds of finding a spouse, and he also said that prayer without doing any kind of work will not lead to anywhere. At this moment I realized that I've been living a life of "more Catholic than The Pope".
Since the conversations in June 2023 I started to attend more social events little by little, to meet other people (and women of course). And eventually since March 2024 I begin to ramp up my self improvement progress, and finally in May 2024 my self-improvement is at the most maximum way possible:
- In March 2024 I literally asked my priest about celibacy and finding a spouse. He said that I should not be a literal involuntary celibate, if I feel forced to be a celibate than I better not be one. My priest then directs me to pray the akathist to St. Xenia of Petersburg and then recite the prayer to find a spouse. My priest also remarked that I have to put real world effort into finding a spouse such as by attending more social events, ask someone to introduce me to a woman who is still single, through a matchmaking events, etc.
- In March 2024 until now, by looking in the Courtship subforum and the threads/posts in there, we can draw conclusion that real world effort and game is needed (at least the basic understanding). This hits like a brick to me that you can't just pray to God, meet a woman, start speaking in tongue to her and announce your intention of marriage. We need to understand game and red pill concepts, and the ability to apply it!
- The final kick was back in April and May 2024 I attended several church events. I observed that there are much more males than females in my church (and even other churches). Competition is fierce and we absolutely need game and red pill teachings to compete even in church settings. I was forced to swallow the red pill by facing this kind of reality. The term "Display of Higher Value" and "Alpha Male of Group" absolutely apply in my observations.
Just like Kyle Katarn, The Jedi Exile and Obi-Wan Kenobi who cut themselves off The Force, only to reconnect to The Force during time of great need and use their power for good, I will re-learn all the old red pill materials, /r/TheRedPill best posts, Roosh's game books (which I already bought years ago), Roissy's writings and other manosphere contents. I have also lift weights as much as my body can handle.
However I did not fully regret wasting three years from 2020 to mid 2023 doing no real world effort and no self improvement. The learning moment for me is to not blindly trust anyone (except our Lord Jesus Christ) like a sheep. I should have been able to form conclusions and make my own decisions like a man.
Now I have decided to learn all the old teachings of game and red pill materials to its maximum extent. Also to lift heavy, dress well, have a social status, earn more money, basically to be the best version of myself. Looksmaxxing and Faithmaxxing combined, the Yin and Yang of self improvement.
Fuck its good to be back.
