I'm considering converting back to Catholicism.
Fr. Moses' message is to not convert just to a singular parish or canonical jurisdiction, but to follow Christ until the death no matter how narrow the truth gets, with the presupposition that Orthodox Christianity is the truth.
Today is the Sunday of the Samaritan woman, and Christ says in the Gospel "salvation is of the Jews" - the Church is the new Israel, and St. Paul warns the Romans that they could be cut off of the "tree" if they become arrogant, so make of that what you will.
One major difference between post schism Latins and the Orthodox is the view on grace. Fr. Seraphim Rose (he was an atheist until he began to continually seek the truth as a monastic, no money, no wife, but lots of grace and a brilliant mind) says in God's Revelation to The Human Heart that the focus on completion of obligations and externals in Latin theology is a replacement of the Holy Spirit - in other words the Bishops lost the grace of the Holy Spirit when they schismed and lied against Constantinople with lies and an actual forgery called the Donation of Constantine. Latins don't believe you experience God, they believe you experience "created grace" and Fr. Seraphim's anaylsis of this is that Rome is a religion of the mind only now, though God in His providence either draws back His lost sheep into the Orthodox fold, or as Fr. Seraphim says, gives them grace
in spite of being outside the Church, and we leave judgement to the merciful God. Yes, we recognize that the world is horrible and the schism was horrifying, but it happened over centuries, and the laity of the west more or less let it happen to their own selves... this is the point Fr. Moses is getting at. And another put it perfectly with scripture "The kingdom of heaven is taken with force by those who are violent" that is, those who don't stop seeking, even when they feel like an atheist - And I believe you that you've tried very hard and yet feel like one. The worst thing we, who are mortal, can do on the paths to our deaths is give up, and even worse, notice that we are becoming prideful, but not ask God continually to save us from the foot of pride.
Martin Luther knew of Orthodoxy, yet he chose himself because of prelest, also, he was a big sinner but that's a different case. The Lutherans have "confession" but in a similar way, they eerily as a "church" recognize the total lack of grace by not doing any absolution, even though Christ promised His one Church that the apostolic ministers had power to bind and loose and be a conduit for the Holy Spirit to heal us. Christ is willing and even able to save all as the scriptures say, if only we don't give up, that's the caveat, and Judges 7:2, that's why many perish. I think that even the righteous praying for the dead is God's providence, He knew who would pray, wouldn't He? God knows our paths, and even if someone pulled a gun on you, God could jam the trigger if He knew He could save you, wouldn't He? But that doesn't mean all will be saved at all, despite Him desiring very much so.
I wish I knew your name, but I'm saying Lord have mercy for you regardless, because I know how hard it can get. We ALL need divine grace. I can't do anything on my own, brother. I know my memory is bad because I'm going through a very harsh time, and I know Orthodoxy is true, so even when I feel the closest I've ever been to feeling atheist, I know God is real, I just know I've tasted His beloved grace - and He is not the God of confusion. Furthermore, if He is real, He has a plan for us all, so who am I to step aside? But maybe, if He sees He can redeem evil to good, He lets us become lost for a little while. But the tomb is empty, brother, no doubt about it, and the world is against us, no doubt about it, but what mortal can stand against Christ and His love for us? None. Please, whatever you do, don't give up. And take a hike every so often, know thyself.
If you ever feel better about it, always remember to set reading the scriptures and gospels, and the lives of saints,
every day, as a priority.