I don't think I'd go near a woman who was overly active on instagram. I might give a pass if she never posted or just posted her cross stitch or whatever, but even then I'd be dubious.
Help with an ex issue, not a joke or troll
- Thread starter KulturedKaveman
- Start date
The uncertainty here leads me to think that if you can honestly and thoroughly understand the likely reasons for the 'why', this will give you some clear steps forward.
If the following quote "I can’t get a woman to look at me" has a literal meaning (?) then I'd say... think about talking with at least one trusted male friend who is attractive/successful and one female acquaintance who can help you with feedback and tips on one or more of the following areas:
- Haircut
- Grooming and skin
- Wardrobe
- Posture
- Body condition - weight, body fat, muscle
- Photos/profile (if using online apps / media)
- Etc
"But a good Christian woman shouldn't be so superficial to care about these things" I hear in the background. Yeah, fair enough, I get that. Men should also not be overly concerned with their appearance. That's just gee ay why.
Nonetheless, I'm more interested in what actually works (i.e., men improving their chances) rather than:
- what should be the case (according to a fantasy of ideals),
- what may only apply to a very small minority (women who are extremely rare or isolated), or
- what could happen if a guy misuses the advice (becomes a homo, gets 78 units of botox, and starts moisturising every hour).
A. Where is the bottleneck?
- you're not getting initial interest (see above for suggested solutions)
- you're getting initial interest but can't get dates,
- you're getting dates but not follow-up investment,
- you're getting post-date investment but not the kind of relationship you want, etc
B. What are your mediums, and how do you use them?
- church
- social circle
- clubs like sports or special interest groups
- cold approach
- online dating apps / social media
^ Over-reliance on any one singular source is not recommended.
C. What has changed in the external environment?
- have you stayed in the same place?
- have you noticed a change in attitudes?
Most environments got harder in recent years, with the main eras in your lifetime -- depending on your location/niche etc -- being *approximately*:
● PRE-2012 - before tinder was released and facebook acquired instagram. You could still be a big fish in a small pond back then, before the small ponds started to evaporate as big tech spread everywhere.
● 2013-2019 - it developed into tougher times with the rise of rabid feminism, bumble/hinge etc; but now seems like the good ol' days in retrospect.
● POST-2020 - people worldwide were forced to live, work, interact, and date online following the cornflake-19 scamdemic, thus making digital empires even bigger; leading to... more women on dating sites, selling themselves online, with inflated egos, on anti-depressants, with social anxiety, etc.
D. What has changed for you?
- your standards changed?
- your type changed?
- your energy and efforts changed?
- your appearance changed and you look older?
When men's age ticks over from 29 to 30 years old, this makes getting early 20-somethings harder in general. Attractive women use arbitrary numbers to screen out men, especially online, for instance: age 39 OK, 40 not okay, 100 followers OK; 99 not okay; height 6'0" OK; 5'11" not okay. No use whining about these facts, single guys are better served by accepting them and moving on with action.
All that said:
-> these are all just generalised points that you can potentially smash through as an individual, and,
-> you are still in your golden years.
Looks like a plan to me. Anything stopping you from booking in flights?
TIP 3: I recommend you consider travelling to several countries or continents (perhaps South America, East Asia, or Eastern Europe depending on your taste) and *then* reconsider the question about single mums.
Great!
If the main problem with hoeflation relates to diminishing quality of women and returns on mens' efforts in the dating market over time, then one of the best solutions is this:
TIP 4. Do not delay. Start taking action and make things happen immediately. No matter how small, take that next step now.
The idea that a guy, especially in his 30s onwards, can just save a lot of money over years or even decades and travel overseas to easily scoop up a foreign unicorn neglects the degradation of options due to the passage of time.
Working on things like social skills, which tend to degrade without practice, should still be a priority in any case, regardless of where a man lives.
TIP 5. Other Ideas
It may be worth revisiting this post from last year, since it probably contained more ideas and resources that could be reasonably digested in a single sitting:
I hope this helps. All the best
Last edited:
Bingo.
I got most of my hot 20 somethings in my 40s during the 2005 to 2010 era. A lot of it was location (Los Angeles), the "timing" of the era, and using Craig's List. I posted funny personal ads on Craig's List LA with titles like, "Teacher Seeks Student For Spankings And Lectures" and "Genius Seeks Hottie For 30-Day Fling." Absolutely was drowning in beautiful women using the written word as the humorous ice breaker before the initial meet and greet. And mind you I was living in a van, fairly broke, and running only decent in person game. I'm tall, but by no means did I have model looks, nor was I in great shape (much less did I have a six pack). I was just negging hard and running fearless "I don't give a sh*t" caveman game with a touch of nice guy beta to seal the deal.
So, it was definitely an era where pulling women hotter than you was easy compared to now. Back in the day you would regularly see guys who are 5's with girls who were 7's, and now it is completely normal to see guys who are 7's with girls that are 5's. 100% complete reversal. The thirst is real.
I still feel that with a lot of effort I could pull a good looking early to mid-30s woman in 2025 but I have lost a lot of interest in women these days and barely look at them anymore, much less do I speak to them. I mean, I speak to dozens of good looking women every week as part of my job but I never flirt with them, much less do I ask them for their name or phone number. I'm over it. I never want to hear the word "no" cross the threshold of a woman's mouth ever again.
It seems to me that in America in 2025 that men and woman are in the midst of a Mexican Standoff because women refuse to admit that feminism is a lie, abortion is murder, and that men are far superior to women in almost every single way. I think if men hold out another 5 years and keep improving themselves, stacking cash, and ignoring women that we will win the standoff. Make them unclog their own toilets, live with cats, and whore themselves out on Only Fans until they're ready to come back to the bargaining table and admit the error of their ways.
Last edited:
I think the AI revolution is not going to be good for women. Say goodbye to a lot of those easy, white collar office jobs that women do. You want to design a marketing presentation? AI can do that. You want to translate that email from Spanish, write that news article? AI can do that too. Marketing and HR departments have also become far too bloated and companies are realizing they can cut the fat without any significant loss. Wokeness is on the downswing so they don't feel as guilty anymore.
In 2023 this chart shows a huge spike in unemployment rates in many female dominated professions. Software engineers aren't doing well either, but a lot of that is due the big tech bubble bursting. Some men in STEM jobs will suffer too, but AI is creating new efficiency and opportunities to compensate. Although I wouldn't recommend anyone study computer science now, I really expect it to get worse for women's professions. Men may actually be better off overall because more blue collar jobs are coming back with these tariffs. So when women can't pay the bills, and the 7 that works at the local Starbucks realizes she can't pull a billionaire, they're going to come crawling back to average men who can support them.
Women have so much pride now I can't see them backing down unless there is a total collapse to the point where first world countries become like Venezuela or Cuba. I can see it getting to the point where a 7 out of 10 girl will eat instant noodles and live in a share house with 10 other people rather than "settle" for an average man.
When I was in Colombia for the second time 3 years ago 7s were no longer easy to get (although not impossible like the west). 6s were still fairly obtainable but they had a lot of attitude to the point where the juice isn't worth the squeeze. Of course not quite western level attitude but ghosting, flaking, attention whoring, gold digging, disrespect, etc were still common among 6s which is insane considering that I am literally wealthier than 99.8% of the population in Colombia and I am in the top 25% in terms of male height in Colombia yet I still had women behaving badly towards me due to the cancerous western feminism that has infected their society. And yes I speak some Spanish before anybody tries to jump in with that.
There were plenty of times in Colombia were I got rejected by girls working as shop assistants etc that were earning $350 USD per month (pre-tax).
I had a similar experience in Peru, Mexico and Chile.
So the standard of living for women in the USA, Australia, Canada, etc getting cut in half in the next 15 years really isn't going to move their needle in terms of changing their attitude. Things would need to get really dire for that to happen.
Last edited:
Well what is an average guy? I’m afraid of doxing myself but by many metrics I’m out performing my early 30s peers. Most live off of mommy and daddy legacy.
Own own home
Income 80-100k per year depending on external factors.
Actually have a personality and can throw down in the kitchen and have a lot of oddball hobbies. Getting into traveling and she could come with.
Musician - can play 4 instruments.
Problem is I live in the rust belt and not California or the East Coast.
I also am not six foot tall. I don’t understand why that’s so important. I could absolutely maul some of these six foot goobers but hey, three inches makes a difference. I really believe popularity is the special sauce and I’ve found myself quite isolated post covid. I’m thinking about trying to put my musical skills to the wheel and start a band. Bag an alt gal maybe
.
I got laid a lot in high school and college so this makes sense. Seemed effortless 2006-2009, then in 2009 I met the gal in question. We were together till 2014. it was ok 2014-2017. 2018 met my most recent girlfriend. We split in ‘22. I can’t get any play since then. Makes no sense. If it wasn’t a security risk id share my college ID and a current picture. I don’t look that different.
Honestly, this is the long game. The smart game. But in order for this to happen the dollars value will have to be halved to the point where it hurts to live alone. You’re not doing only fans in a shared house. I lived in New York. You’d have to schedule bringing a girl over with the other 4 guys to make them scram. China and Russia will have to ascend, and there will have to be no more tinder and easy corporate jobs to inflate ego. If we’re real, They are going away in real time as we speak. All we have to do is run out the clock.
Problem is if we run out the clock it will be 2050 and I’ll be 60. I want to enjoy what’s left of my youth. The other day I was in wal mart. I don’t man to swear but JEEZUS. The human capital in this country is so gutted I don’t think America can support the systems that make modern feminism possible anymore.
I should be ok with never having a family and never having sex again. I had some good but sinful stuff. At least got a taste. My gen z siblings, not so lucky. Running out the clock might be the best bet. Something something plant trees under whose shade you’ll never sit.
Last edited:
Nah, it ain't this bleak. Just keep improving all your numbers without thinking about time. Enjoy life alone. Sounds like you've got a lot to offer and now you just need one miracle. You can only be with one woman and I'm sure if you're a good enough man over a long enough period of time that God will throw a unicorn your way within the next five years. If not, then maybe He has other plans for your life.
Or you could just go overseas which is equivalent to winding the clock back 10 - 15 years (in terms of the degradation of women).
I got approximately 100k in the bank. 4.2% ROI. How do convert that into passive income and gtfo? I’d like to get into work from anywhere but I need profession ideas. I’ll leave tomorrow once I acquire the required skill.
I am planning on starting a band tho. Maybe some alt gal will like the guitar player. Goth-thic
Ideally you would have $200,000 then there could be a more viable plan. But with $100,000 you might be able to scrape through (albeit with more risk). Here is what you could do with $100,000:
If you have $100,000 and you are willing to live frugally and take some risk you could make it work. If you go out now and buy $100,000 worth of Bitcoin ASAP and post it as collateral you could borrow $1000 per month (using a company such as LEDN for example) against your Bitcoin and spend it. Most companies that lend against Bitcoin won't liquidate you until you get above 70% (sometimes higher depending on the company) loan to value ratio. It varies a little by company but generally you are looking at interest rates of around 12.5% give or take 1 or 2% depending on the company.
This would give you $1000 per month spending money and you can just keep rolling over the loans. $1000 per month spending money would give you a basic yet comfortable lifestyle in most third world countries. You could move to a countruy such as Colombia, Ecuador, Peru, Thailand, Cambodia, Vietnam, Kosovo, etc and get by okay with $1000 per month for the basic expat lifestyle.
This will work as long as Bitcoin doesn't have a 70% drop from current levels in the next bear market. There is actually a decent chance the plan could work out. But it is not without risk. If you are interested I could actually do some basic scenario analysis and go into more detail of how it work exactly.
If the Bitcoin price goes up tenfold in the next 10 years. $100,000 worth of Bitcoin today will be worth $1 million dollars and if you borrowed $1000 per month (increasing the $1000 every year to adjust for inflation) against your Bitcoin and capitalized all the interest you might have something like $300,000 in loans against your $1 million dollars worth of Bitcoin after 10 years. At that point if you want to de-risk and not take the risk of getting liquidated any longer you could sell some Bitcoin and pay off the loan and then with the remainder of your bitcoin sell a bit every month and live from the proceeds.
Lots of variables at play and its certainly not risk free but at its core its just a basic carry trade. If for example the Bitcoin price increases at 26%+ per annum compound in the next decade (10x in a decade) and meanwhile you are paying 13% interest rate you are pocketing the 13% differential. Basically an infinite money machine. Your own Micro-stategy if you will.
Another version of this although again with more risk because you don't have custody of the Bitcoin is to buy a Bitcoin ETF such as IBIT and get a margin loan against the ETF. For example with Robin hood you currently pay 5.75% interest rate on margin loans. That is less than half the interest rate that you would pay if you self custody Bitcoin and borrow against it directly.
A third alternative is to borrow against your Bitcoin (or Bitcoin ETF) to buy even more Bitcoin and then sell a little bit of the additional Bitcoin you purchased every month. For example if you have $100,000 buy $100,000 worth of Bitcoin and then borrow $50,000 against your Bitcoin and buy an additional $50,000 worth of Bitcoin. Now you own $150,000 worth of Bitcoin and have a $50,000 loan which is a loan to value ratio (LVR) of one third (33.33%). You then sell $1000 worth of Bitcoin every month. Then after twelve months you capitalise the interest and roll over the loan. This has the advantage of making the interest payments tax deductible (because the loan is being used to for investment i.e. to buy Bitcoin instead of for personal use) in addition to giving you more total Bitcoin exposure (therefore higher potential gains). The downside is more liquidation risk (due to a higher LVR) and you will end up paying some capital gains taxes (if the Bitcoin price goes up) because you are selling some of your Bitcoin.
Another option if you want to take a lower risk option is buy $100,000 worth of Bitcoin now and just sell $1000 worth of Bitcoin every month and live off it in a thrid world country. Of course there is some sequence of return risk (in addition to capital gains taxes) but if Bitcoin compounds at 26% per annum plus over the next 10 - 15 years you can just sell $1000 per month worth of Bitcoin and still never run out of money. This way you are not paying interest and are not exposed to margin calls but of course you get less upside exposure to Bitcoin.
There are other options regarding Bitcoin that are more complicated but these are some of your basic strategies that you can implement.
Last edited:
^ Though I appreciate AS's effort in generating ideas I wouldn't go the bitcoin route.
You own your house, have 100K banked, are making a 100K a year, are in your 30's, play four instruments, and are starting a rock band!
C'mon man, you got this.
This is against "the rules" according to the old forum but you might consider bringing a girl from abroad back home on a tourist visa and blow her mind with how much you have and how together your life is.
A girl that is use to seeing poverty all around her will be highly impressed with your life. Court her in her own country and then dangle "a free trip" to the US to visit you to seal the deal. Having her on a tourist visa and you in control of her itinerary will keep her in check in terms of hypergamous monkey branching.
I like Latin America because it is close to home. Nicaragua is where I've spent a lot of time. The women aren't as hot as Colombia but there are still some stunners. The thing about Nicaragua is that it is cheap and safe (as long as you don't go out at night drinking). You literally triple your money when you hit the ground. If you take 5K for two weeks it spends like 15K. Nicaragua has a huge love of music and so your skills will be highly valued by the local population down there (start learning about their musical folk heroes Carlos and Luis Enrique Mejia Godoy).
Start learning Spanish if you decide to go this route.
Also, if you are interested in Japan (or some rich European countries) I can help you invest some of your money in starting a vintage clothing business where you pack your bags with made in USA vintage clothing (pay extra baggage fees) and sell the clothes when you hit the ground (this might even work in Bogota, Colombia as there are a bunch of rich hipsters there).
Didn't realize Kultured Kaveman owned his own house. If you own your own house debt free you could rent it out full time and use that cash flow to help pay for living overseas (in addition to the returns you would get from investing your $100,000 in Bitcoin. If you rented out your house how much income would it generate per month after all expenses and taxes? For example if your house (by renting it out long term) generates $750 per month of net cashflow and you buy $100,000 of bitcoin and sell $750 per month of bitcoin for cash flow now you have $1500 of monthly cash flow to cover your basic costs in a cheap country.
Usually tricky to get a tourist visa for a woman from a third world country to visit the USA. A lot of headaches will be involved and you might fail in the end.
Last edited:
actually, that’s a genius idea. Don’t have to limit it to cloths. Could just import cheap stuff and sell it on the streets. Books dvds etc. An easy way to get your hands on American goods and media. Only problem is international business regulations. The Colombian or Filipino IRS might come after you if someone did this. And I’d have to do the thought exercise on profit margins.
It’s sad we need to have these conversations though. I actually was talking to my sister about the state of relationships last night. Some of her comments stuck with me. She wants a guy who ticks all the boxes and was talking about how she shouldn’t have to compromise her standards cos nobody else has to. Problem is nobody’s perfect but she thinks all her friends husbands are and she wants something like that. However the thing I noticed is they all got together before the dating market self destructed. Like they were all married around the time I was with the gal this threads about. They also tied the knot in their early 20s. If you want a perfect husband, I think the time for that has passed. You’ll have to compromise. Of course I didn’t say that but was thinking it.
This just reminded me of what Purple was talking about. We really are at a Mexican stand off. But I think it’s less about feminism and dnc dogma, but it’s pride, the mother of all sins. Compromising in relationships means you’re not knowing your worth rather than the other persons a flawed human and you need to work on things. The consequence is we crash out alone at 50. Like earlier in this thread I was complaining about single moms. I’m considering it now only under the condition she’s willing to have more kids. That’s an example of compromise. Australia might be right after that conversation. Women would live 10 to a house and eat ramen before compromise because of that “know your worth” lie.
I feel the male incel phenomenon ironically comes from a similar place. I believe a lot of these guys could get laid, just not by the material they want. Like I can go get tinder and probably get the poison out with some single moms and a couple ham beasts… but that orthodoxy thing.
This is why you bring in suitcases of nicely folded used clothes... "Those are all mine, I might be staying awhile."
I'm talking specifically MADE IN USA vintage clothing. I regularly buy 1980's Levis for $5 a pair and flip them for $80 to $120. A couple of months ago I found a pair of 1970's Nike's that I paid $2 for that a Japanese buyer has been trying to take off my hands for 4K (I'm holding as they will most likely go up in value). I know of an Australian couple that flies to LA every two months for the Rose Bowl Flea Market (which is one of the biggest vintage clothing events in the world with over 800 vintage clothing vendors), spends 5K and then goes back to Australia and sells it all for 20K in one weekend (they do this on a tourist's visa as customs doesn't realize they are doing business because their bags are packed with used clothes).
Last year the vintage clothing market hit one billion in sales and is projected to hit 4 billion within the next couple of years.
Last edited:
How do you find your customers? Seems like that would be the hardest part.
It's a long story. I'm sure there are tons of videos on YouTube titled "How To Get Into The Vintage Clothing Business."
The main issue is sourcing product which has gotten quite competitive. As you can imagine, when 1993 Nirvana Heart Shaped Box promo tees are selling for $1500+, everybody and their brother are searching for them.
Selling is a bit easier (but not "easy") as you can seek out potential buyers on Instagram before you depart for your travels. You search Google for "Vintage Clothing Stores" and "Pop-Up Vintage Clothing Markets" in the area you are thinking of going to. For example there are big yearly vintage clothing "events" in Malaysia and Thailand (long story on how that came to be), and also here in the US we have something called "Thrift-Con" which is a massive bi-monthly event that happens yearly across the US (in Atlanta, Denver, Philadelphia, Portland, etc.).
The great thing we have going for us right now in terms of the global vintage clothing market here in the US is that the world wants our old clothing (1990's and older) so we are at the epicenter of sourcing.