I can’t help but think the OP is an entriest. Based on the woke language and thinking not only in this thread but some of the things he wrote on RVF. I can’t help but get a vibe of resentment of white men from him.
Finding a traditional wife abroad
- Thread starter Nagareboshi
- Start date
You probably saw my recent response too, but I'm glad you referred to the OP, as I didn't read the first post and now I see that it was a strange set up for this thread/topic.
Getting at what @Cynllo was saying, I think a large part of the modern "problem" is being disconnected from your past, not knowing your past, not even knowing history at all, etc. I was telling someone today that most people don't have a clue about the role the sexes, family, and cooperation had to play in the past in most, if not all, countries. Nothing about this current culture is realistic at all regarding women, family, having and raising children, etc. The combination of attention and resources that the West brought forth for women made them largely disinterested in men in any way but as an accessory. It's my feeling that the only fix for this will be the eventual/significant loss of population and a world where you can't rely on some degree of spoiling - whether that is from the parents or the other parent, the .gov
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I’m fine with, and in fact, actually support good Christians moving abroad to escape the excesses of modern declining civilization to plant roots in more traditional societies. You should definitely do this if your priest supports it and you think it’s good for your soul.
There’s a difference between a healthy international marriage focused on Christian principles with the intention of raising kids and settling down, versus a rootless grifter trying to get the best of both worlds in a Third World country dating a green card hunter. We all know that the second type of person exists so it’s really not a complicated question. If you’re not able to understand the difference I don’t have any more to say to you. No one’s accusing you of being the second type of person, so there’s no reason to be defensive unless you feel you were personally attacked, in which case you should examine yourself and your reasons for seeking out certain lifestyle choices.
The original OP was NOT INTENDED to be a complete thread on its own, one of the admins moved it here from an earlier subthread, and it doesn’t have any substance to stand on its own as an actual topic. Forgive me if that caused any misunderstanding. Check out my reply here: https://christisking.eu/index.php?threads/finding-a-traditional-wife-abroad.42/#post-537
There’s a difference between a healthy international marriage focused on Christian principles with the intention of raising kids and settling down, versus a rootless grifter trying to get the best of both worlds in a Third World country dating a green card hunter. We all know that the second type of person exists so it’s really not a complicated question. If you’re not able to understand the difference I don’t have any more to say to you. No one’s accusing you of being the second type of person, so there’s no reason to be defensive unless you feel you were personally attacked, in which case you should examine yourself and your reasons for seeking out certain lifestyle choices.
The original OP was NOT INTENDED to be a complete thread on its own, one of the admins moved it here from an earlier subthread, and it doesn’t have any substance to stand on its own as an actual topic. Forgive me if that caused any misunderstanding. Check out my reply here: https://christisking.eu/index.php?threads/finding-a-traditional-wife-abroad.42/#post-537
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Having been to Mexico, Colombia, Peru and Chile I am not sure where this fetishizing of the "Latina Tradwife" comes from. Don't get me wrong I like Latinas too. There are many beautiful Latinas and they tend to have a fun vibe and zest for life and aren't angry and sour like western women.
However in Latin America the cultures are so messed up (lying, cheating, stealing, corruption, single mothers, gold-digging, etc). I found it very rare to meet a decent girl that would be worth marrying. Yes they exist in slightly larger numbers than in the west but its certainly no paradise. At some point I will probably try my luck in some of the better European countries (slavic countries, baltics, balkans, etc) to see first hand if the situation is any better (yes you can read all the opinions you want but until you put your own boots on the ground and make your own assessment you won't know how it feels top you.).
Also looking for immigrant communities in an anglosphere country is inferior to going to the source country and that has generally been an agreed upon principle in red pill circles for a long time now for reasons we all know about (unbfavourable laws for men, negative culutural influence, supply vs demand dynamics for attractive fertile women being worse in the west hence raising their value, etc).
It comes back to the old chestnut "there are no solutions only tradeoffs".
After traveling a lot you realize there is no perfect place to settle down where the women are beautiful and traditional, climate is good, architecture is good, food is good and the government is not too tyrannical, cost of living is reasonable, etc.
But nevertheless many men myself included (despite knowing its likely not rational) are always in search of the holy grail as hope springs eternal.
An Orthodox Christian brother doing a month-long stay in Russia mentioned that the food was tastier, less processed, and it was easier to see casual Christianity present in the local culture, for example icon shops being present in secular shopping malls and subway stations. I would probably agree with you about the ugly architecture based on the pics I’ve seen as well.
Fr Joseph, whose blog I linked earlier, is an Orthodox priest who successfully moved to Russia and talks about how Orthodoxy is so deeply engrained in the Russian culture in so many ways that it’s almost impossible to explain. Russia apparently produces the largest by volume Orthodox Christian content in the form of books, articles, TV shows, documentaries, movies … and no other country even comes close. It seems like you can spend your entire weekend watching Orthodox TV in Russia if you want. So you see more of Christianity present in the secular culture.
It's why I specifically advocated to looking at Latinas that are involved in Christian communities and have been raised in families that have promoted the faith. In the video I posted there's actually a pretty good example of the ratchet, trashy Latina you are referring to (the girl in the center of the preview picture that is sticking her tongue out) but in contrast, there was also the girl who is still a virgin in her mid 20s even though she's had three boyfriends, each of which she stated that she had told beforehand that she wasn't going to have sex with them unless they are married.
Yes but by that logic you could look for a Mormon or Amish girl that is pure American and a virgin.
The question goes back to supply and demand and how common are such types of good girls in one country vs another country? Otherwise you are just using female logic of looking at the exception to the rule.
My basic point being that most Latin American countries are not too much more religious than anglosphere countries with the general exception being older people. In Latin America I noticed a lot of people aged 50+ were genuine practicing Christians but in terms of looking for a woman of marriageable age the number of genuine Christians seemed to be not much higher than Anglosphere countries as Latin America has experienced a profound cultural shift over the past 50 years.
Sure Latina Tradwives exist in the same way that a religious virgin girl in the U.S.A. in the deep south or in Amish or Mormon communities etc still exist but generally speaking its not really a common thing in Latin America so its again looking for the needle in the haystack.
You brought back a decade old memory of mine. I was sitting on a bench in Medellin in a not so nice neighborhood, the kind of area where you periodically look over your shoulder to make sure no one's following you. A beautiful Christian girl walked up to me and asked for donations for her church. I understand a good deal of Spanish but can't really speak it, so I did my best to have a conversation because back then I was still a mad dog obsessed with finding chances to fornicate.
Now that I think back to it, she seemed genuinely friendly and very humble compared to the materialistic, shallow types you mostly find in Colombia. Like she didn't belong in that area at all, a diamond in the rough. And how often do you see a young woman walking around a sketchy neighborhood all day to support her church? It got me thinking how we really are looking for that needle in the haystack, how rarely we see women who might even possibly be a good candidate for marriage in any country. But they are out there, we mustn't lose faith. By God's providence anything can happen.
The Americas offer better building blocks for a marriage, simply because they still have quite clearly defined gender roles and many women are looking for a man to look after them. You are lucky to find a Western woman who wants to be taken care at 30. There is pretty much nothing there (in general) that will make a traditional family work with a Western woman. It's something you have to build towards. Also in LatAm, many women are specifically looking for a guy who is older than 40, as they see they are reliable etc. Or some of them. But, yes, it is full of low quality women for one reason or another.
But it is clear to me, that as a male you need to cut your losses - this is a bad time and you are likely going to have to adjust your sights down to seal the deal. What makes marriage work is social fabric, and that's largely gone. Either try and insert yourself into one of the few places where the fabric still exists or try and re-build it with a wifer-upper.
Right. Actually the part I thought was of primary importance was the religious one but since people previously in the conversation were mentioning going to South America and seeking trad Latinas I thought to throw in the idea that these people could just remain in the US and look for those women within religious communities in the US. You can of course do this with non-Latin women as well. I just wanted to throw in my angle because I have a bit more personal experience with the religious evangelical Latinas in the US. You are right that these type of women are more and more uncommon and the fact they are not as common in Latin America as people seem to think is another point in favor of just staying in the US to seek these women out as opposed to making the bigger investment of time/money to go to South America.
It's more about the culture than the "fetish" for any particular group.
There are still cultures where there is no divorce rape, no "rape culture" nonsense, no diversity garbage, no "strong wahmen" junk, and the man is head of his house, and the woman defers (this is a very strong biblical principle, but very hard to find in most Christian communities today). Where degeneracy and weird sex stuff is shunned and not excepted. I'll never forget the look of shock on my girlfriend's face when I showed her the Sasha Baron Coen "Bruno" film. She had never seen anything so crass. And she was not a particularly religious or conservative girl, just a typical Central American Latina.
To paraphrase Bechamp, the individual is nothing; the terrain is everything.
This is why searching for an average girl in a traditional society can be more rewarding than searching for a Mormon or Mennonite living in America. Unless you find one without a tv or smartphone then you simply cannot compete with the society.
I agree that Latin America is less bad than any Anglosphere country for wife hunting and I do not think anybody here would dispute that. But that is like being the tallest midget in a group of midgets, It is not much of an achievement really.
I went out to dinner in Russia with two young Orthodox women. It was pleasant to be around mentally healthy, pleasant, modest women even though there was a slight language barrier with my mediocre Russian. Previously I was so used to having my passions stirred when interacting with women, but this time, I felt nothing of the sort, despite their beauty.
It was liberating to realise that it is possible to interact with women and come away with a desire to strive toward virtue. As hilariously obvious as that may seem to some of you, to a reformed-coomer it’s a revelation of sorts. Is this my first taste of being a well-adjusted normal person? Who knows?
The downside will be returning to the west, the contrast has been absolutely stark.
It was liberating to realise that it is possible to interact with women and come away with a desire to strive toward virtue. As hilariously obvious as that may seem to some of you, to a reformed-coomer it’s a revelation of sorts. Is this my first taste of being a well-adjusted normal person? Who knows?
The downside will be returning to the west, the contrast has been absolutely stark.
That's why I think it's a good thing to live somewhere where you're surrounded by good looking women. You get used to it and it becomes normal. You get to enjoy the beauty without getting overwhelmed/desperate. And you get to notice their qualities and attributes without being too distracted by beauty, because the beauty would be normal and no big deal.
Conversely, living in a country with unattractive women (either inner or outer) helps keep you focused on your job, your hobbies, church, and prayer.
My reaction:
Threatened women in the comment section:
I personally prefer the non EU Balkan countries, like Serbia, Bosnia (the Christian dominated part), Montenegro, over Russia because I find the cultural and climate jump to Russia pretty big.
Those Balkan people essentially enjoy things Westerners for too, while also being pious, having family values and generally not promoting promiscuity.
As someone said earlier, you can just be a friendly guy and don't have to go through the madness of "proving your value" by dating multiple girls simultaneously, thus, creating some kind of jealousy complex and winning the girl over. I'm speaking strictly when courting an average but attractive girl. Of course, even in the west I have met groups of virgins, usually from Slovakia or Lebanon that were studying or working abroad.
However, the importance of learning the language shouldn't be underestimated. It's a true game changer due to how it helps understand their music, their culture and, ultimately, their people. I haven't seen another area in Europe that appreciates your efforts that much.
Those Balkan people essentially enjoy things Westerners for too, while also being pious, having family values and generally not promoting promiscuity.
As someone said earlier, you can just be a friendly guy and don't have to go through the madness of "proving your value" by dating multiple girls simultaneously, thus, creating some kind of jealousy complex and winning the girl over. I'm speaking strictly when courting an average but attractive girl. Of course, even in the west I have met groups of virgins, usually from Slovakia or Lebanon that were studying or working abroad.
However, the importance of learning the language shouldn't be underestimated. It's a true game changer due to how it helps understand their music, their culture and, ultimately, their people. I haven't seen another area in Europe that appreciates your efforts that much.
It's amazing how in some countries the genetics (and femininity) are so great that even girls considered to be "plane janes" by local standards are still top 10% in the west. Like in Czechia or Serbia or Ukraine etc a 25 year old girl that is considered a run of the mill "plane Jane" by local men is still more attractive than 90% of women in Anglo-sphere countries. It must be quite shock for guys that move from such countries to the Anglo Sphere. In Australia sometimes I can go months without meeting a woman who is completely feminine (the foreign women here mostly get corrupted very quickly).
I totally agree with this and they fall on my spectrum of preference. I don't think it's totally unrelated, but they have a look that is "different" that I imagine not all might like, but I tend to like it or give it greater leeway. There is a slavic look I do not like, but mostly I just consider that to be ugly like any other girl I might come across ... lol
The problem is, as I've stated, the number of 6.5s and up (6.5 or late bloomer 7 is probably the best wife, where she will really treat you well and you're attracted but you don't have to do ridiculous things or spend/run through hoops to maintain her like an "8") in the west is in the low single %, like 1-3.