Strange Spiritual Occurrence

[TruthTeller]

I wanted to post in @TrainedLogosmotion monk mode celibacy thread, but it seems like I couldn’t.

Last night I took a step in the right direction and deleted every phone number of a woman who could be a temptation. All gone. I then watched a video from Father Spyridon, specifically this one:



I’m not Orthodox, but I really like him and his mini sermons pack more of a punch than some full homilies and sermons.

I prayed and asked God to help me in this struggle, stop these stupid acts and find a religious wife. I was inspired by @canuckj post in the dating app thread. Then I went to sleep and things got weird.

I woke up around 2:30 AM and felt heaviness in my chest, like I was being pressed down and burning, but I didn’t see anything. I got up had some water and went back to sleep. I then proceeded to have a very vivid dream where this Asian woman was trying to seduce me. In my dream I resisted her advances and then it seemed like I was being chased by everyone in the bar who were angry at me (the dream occurred in a bar)

I find it very strange that when you make a commitment to stop sinful ways these things happen. It’s not the first time, once I was praying a novena had sleep paralysis and saw an imp like creature.

 

[TruthTeller]

Happened again last night. Had a dream about a girl I knew who would have been a terrible fit for me, but I did once do something with her. She told me, in real life, she was having motherly urges but she had been very promiscuous. In my dream I gave in to the demons, but in real life I have cut her off.

Then I went to church this morning, and a related phenomenon is blasphemous thoughts in church. Has anyone experienced these? It’s nothing severe, but today I looked at the priest and it was just these two thoughts:

“You don’t really believe any of this stuff do you?”

And

“Look how servile he is, he has no mind of his own.”

 

[analyst_green]

I've also had blasphemous thoughts like this, it's fairly common. It happened most strongly when I went to church, and I thought, "what am I doing here, this is ridiculous".

I don't have all the answers. We just have to trust ourselves that we were right when we made the decision to follow Christ. And turn to God for help in overcoming it.

My priest says this is how you know your faith is working. The demons' biggest goal is to keep you from having faith, so they hate when you go to church and will come up with all kinds of lies to distract you. Your own pride will rear its ugly head as well. So flick these thoughts away before they have time to fester in your mind.

 

[doodydota]

My university group is connected on facebook. After many years I signed up again. My account is new. I have not liked anything, but some gardening sites related to my studies. Suffice to say I can not open facebook in front of my mother without shame. Every 2nd "random feed" is filth. I've blocked over 100 accounts. "not interessted" and "harassment". STILL Facebook is agressively pushing the same "influencers" and "tik-toks". I wish here was some 3rd party filter to BAN everything from my feed not related to my subscribtions

 

[Diadem]

I woke up around 2:30 AM and felt heaviness in my chest, like I was being pressed down and burning,

Were you having a heart attack?

“Look how servile he is, he has no mind of his own.”

This isn't a blasphemous thought - you were judging him.

Maybe you need some guidance. Why not reach out to Fr. Spyridon? It says on his parish website "His contact details may be requested by emailing our Church Warden: seraphim.stjohnofshanghai@gmail.com"

 

[analyst_green]

This isn't a blasphemous thought - you were judging him.

His thought was equating serving Christ to a form of weakness. I'd say that qualifies as blasphemy. The priest both represents God to his parish, and represents the parish before God.

 

[Lawrence87]

This life is unceasing warfare unless you capitulate and let the enemy win your soul.

When the enemy starts to use a certain tactic against you. Respond with prayer. The last thing the enemy wants is for you to turn to our Creator. If he sees that his tactic spurs you towards prayer rather than leads you away, he will try something else.

As soon as you wake up from these dreams pray fervently. The same when you notice blasphemous thoughts, do not engage them but say a prayer and glorify God.

 

[TruthTeller]

His thought was equating serving Christ to a form of weakness. I'd say that qualifies as blasphemy. The priest both represents God to his parish, and represents the parish before God.

This is how I viewed it as well.

 

[Diadem]

This is how I viewed it as well.

Ok, call it what you want. You still need guidance. We can't really make any progress by force of willpower alone. You might be able to have a little bit of success initially but you will fall back to your old tendencies. Christ is the only person who can free us from slavery to the passions. Become Orthodox.

 

[TruthTeller]

Ok, call it what you want. You still need guidance. We can't really make any progress by force of willpower alone. You might be able to have a little bit of success initially but you will fall back to your old tendencies. Christ is the only person who can free us from slavery to the passions. Become Orthodox.

I may. I have found it difficult because of the ethnic divisions in some Orthodox parishes I visited. Are most people here cradle Orthodox or American converts? I find that vs. Catholic or even Protestant churches the ethic identity plays a large role in Orthodox parishes.

 

[JCSteel]

I may. I have found it difficult because of the ethnic divisions in some Orthodox parishes I visited. Are most people here cradle Orthodox or American converts? I find that vs. Catholic or even Protestant churches the ethic identity plays a large role in Orthodox parishes.

The Antiochian Orthodox Church I've visited is Western Rite. Everyone there is ex Evangelical, Episcopalian, or Catholic. There is no ethnic dynamic there at all. Services are in English only.

 

[Lawrence87]

I may. I have found it difficult because of the ethnic divisions in some Orthodox parishes I visited. Are most people here cradle Orthodox or American converts? I find that vs. Catholic or even Protestant churches the ethic identity plays a large role in Orthodox parishes.

It is something that is often raised. I have heard stories of people feeling excluded, upon attending an Orthodox church because of this. However it may be that you just have to go a few times and ingratiate yourself with them. Often these stories are just people going one time and being upset that people didn't give them much attention. You might not get a big welcome. People might not speak to you. That doesn't necessarily imply hostility, and people will likely warm to you if you are sincere and keep attending regularly.

 

[Diadem]

Are most people here cradle Orthodox or American converts?

I'd venture to guess that most people here are converts. I'm a convert but after almost 20 years in the faith I'm slowly just "becoming Orthodox." You eventually cease to be a convert, granted that you are actually doing the work.

The ethnic parish thing seems to be more of a problem on the East coast than out here in the West.

 

[TruthTeller]

The Antiochian Orthodox Church I've visited is Western Rite. Everyone there is ex Evangelical, Episcopalian, or Catholic. There is no ethnic dynamic there at all. Services are in English only.

Before you visited the church, were there any indications of this? Is the Antiochian diocese more convert friendly?

 

[TruthTeller]

It is something that is often raised. I have heard stories of people feeling excluded, upon attending an Orthodox church because of this. However it may be that you just have to go a few times and ingratiate yourself with them. Often these stories are just people going one time and being upset that people didn't give them much attention. You might not get a big welcome. People might not speak to you. That doesn't necessarily imply hostility, and people will likely warm to you if you are sincere and keep attending regularly.

That makes sense that you would have to assimilate into the group, I just felt going to a Greek Orthodox Church and not being Greek was odd. I visited a few.

 

[JCSteel]

Before you visited the church, were there any indications of this? Is the Antiochian diocese more convert friendly?

I knew next to nothing about the Antiochian church or Western Rite before I visited. I had visited a ROCOR (Russian Orthodox Church Outside Russia) and an OCA (Orthodox Church in America) Church the previous two weeks. Both of them had the Eastern Rite service and parts of the Liturgy were in Russian. I noticed a lot of blonde Eastern European types in both churches. The ROCOR church had some Asians and blacks in the parish. From what I've heard, ROCOR and Antiochian Churches are more convert friendly. Western Rite Liturgies attract a lot of Ex-Episcopalians and Roman Catholics. Both Antiochian and ROCOR does a Western Rite Service. I don't know much about the Greek Orthodox.

When I visited the Antiochian church the people were friendly. One woman encouraged me to approach the alter for a blessing during communion. I didn't feel any negative energy at the other Orthodox Churches but it was a different vibe. The Antiochian parish is small and there's fellowship and a meal after every Liturgy.

 

[Get2choppaaa]

Before you visited the church, were there any indications of this? Is the Antiochian diocese more convert friendly?

Yes in general.

I go to an Antiochian Church. It's primarily a converts Church... We've got some Russian and Ukrainian, Serbian, and EE folks...with some Arab/Lebanese /Syrian Christians... But majority of us are former white Catholic or WASPs.

Our services are in English.

If you're interested, I'd highly encourage you to go to an Antiochian, or OCA church.

There are many great Greek parishes and priests... but they are somewhat divided into cliques from my experience.

It's a journey, but if you're genuinely interested you'll be very happy you did.

 

[Lawrence87]

That makes sense that you would have to assimilate into the group, I just felt going to a Greek Orthodox Church and not being Greek was odd. I visited a few.

I have heard (from a Greek friend) that Greek parishes can be like this sometimes. Greek people all speaking in Greek etc. It can be difficult for them to understand someone coming into their space because they do percieve their church as a national thing, the same applies to many cradle Orthodox I've spoken with, they are a bit baffled that someone from a non Orthodox country would convert, but its not up to them, and usually they are pleased once they get over their perplexity.

I attend a Russian church and was welcomed as soon as I stepped in the door. Experiences will probably vary.

 

[Christos_NIKA]

I have heard (from a Greek friend) that Greek parishes can be like this sometimes. Greek people all speaking in Greek etc. It can be difficult for them to understand someone coming into their space because they do percieve their church as a national thing, the same applies to many cradle Orthodox I've spoken with, they are a bit baffled that someone from a non Orthodox country would convert, but its not up to them, and usually they are pleased once they get over their perplexity.

I attend a Russian church and was welcomed as soon as I stepped in the door. Experiences will probably vary.

I had the opposite experience: I attended a Russian church for 3 years and in all that time only the priest talked to me. No one asked my name, where I was from, etc. Completely ignored. I left as soon as I found another smaller parish that spoke the local language.

 

[Lawrence87]

I had the opposite experience: I attended a Russian church for 3 years and in all that time only the priest talked to me. No one asked my name, where I was from, etc. Completely ignored. I left as soon as I found another smaller parish that spoke the local language.

As I say mileage may vary and is probably location dependent among other things.

At the end of the day though, we don't go to church for a social club. I'd take a church where no one spoke to me over not being Orthodox. That is not to justify it. I think it is a shame that yourself and others have such an experience, but if you are fully aware that Orthodoxy is the true church then you will bear whatever it takes to go there.