Here's something deep:
Schrödinger's Thread
- Thread starter Batman
- Start date
I'm moving to Ohio to find a Haitian virgin tradwife. I expect my cat dinner to be ready when I get home from work every day.
But seriously though...
I've heard that when economic conditions sharply decline, previously-independent and obnoxious women transform into feminine trad wives who never question your authority.
Such experiences look promising:
My first reaction:
So, does anyone have real, on-the-ground intel about the women in Springfield or other spots in Ohio? Are there many 18 year old virgin 10s there?
No autistic speculation please. Only advice based on real experience is going to help anyone. Otherwise:
There must be plenty of young virgins there ready to marry ASAP, because they can no longer see a future with (missing) cats.
Alternatively, we can start our own virgin trad wife terraforming ecosystem.
Our first official CIK Meetup scheduled for Spring 2036 will be perfect for planning the first stages of this strategy.
1. Choose a small-medium town of our choice. Minimum verified virgin trad wife population: 1,000.
2. Send in Haitians to consume all the pets that represent the conduit for displaced maternal instincts.
3. Deport Haitians once all pets have been eaten. I suggest we drop ship them to San Fran. The furries can get it too.
4. Walk into the local virgin trad wife support group for grieving cat moms and let them know we are serious about exchanging money for marriage, respect, and not being yelled at for mis-matching the pillow cases and bed sheets.
5. We win.
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Nothing deep is deep enough, without Deep Purple. Honestly, people were so calm back then. Had I been sitting in that audience, I would have been rocking my head off. Actually have, seeing them in concert years later.
But seriously though...
I've heard that when economic conditions sharply decline, previously-independent and obnoxious women transform into feminine trad wives who never question your authority.
Such experiences look promising:
My first reaction:
So, does anyone have real, on-the-ground intel about the women in Springfield or other spots in Ohio? Are there many 18 year old virgin 10s there?
No autistic speculation please. Only advice based on real experience is going to help anyone. Otherwise:
There must be plenty of young virgins there ready to marry ASAP, because they can no longer see a future with (missing) cats.
Alternatively, we can start our own virgin trad wife terraforming ecosystem.
Our first official CIK Meetup scheduled for Spring 2036 will be perfect for planning the first stages of this strategy.
1. Choose a small-medium town of our choice. Minimum verified virgin trad wife population: 1,000.
2. Send in Haitians to consume all the pets that represent the conduit for displaced maternal instincts.
3. Deport Haitians once all pets have been eaten. I suggest we drop ship them to San Fran. The furries can get it too.
4. Walk into the local virgin trad wife support group for grieving cat moms and let them know we are serious about exchanging money for marriage, respect, and not being yelled at for mis-matching the pillow cases and bed sheets.
5. We win.
I'll post some threads when I get there.
-Day Game: Springfield
-Voodoo for Beginners
-Is Being a Driving Instructor Worth It?
- I fought 30 Haitian Black Knights in the club.
- Did I get AMOG'd by a Haitian migrant because he has a magic free money card and he ate my cat?
In the olden days, when the internet was young, people had the common courtesy to write "DISREGARD" on a failed thread's title. Everyone knew what that meant and would start disregarding said thread posthaste. And there would be a clear post indicating the end of its disregarding period, so that normalcy could be resumed.
Absent these signs, I've taken the liberty to disregard this thread from its very conception to this day. It's all so tiresome. Inform us at least, what are we supposed to do from now on? Continue disregarding the thread? And what if, it wasn't meant to be disregarded in the first place? All my disregarding was for nothing? Amateurs! Learn how to internet.
Absent these signs, I've taken the liberty to disregard this thread from its very conception to this day. It's all so tiresome. Inform us at least, what are we supposed to do from now on? Continue disregarding the thread? And what if, it wasn't meant to be disregarded in the first place? All my disregarding was for nothing? Amateurs! Learn how to internet.
Post disregarded.
Is this the new "delete" thread? Too few gifs, wnf (would not follow)
This thread is still discovering itself, but I believe it has the potential to be among the most groundbreaking spaces in the history of the internet. A collaborative exercise in postmodern shitposting, a shared experiment testing the boundaries separating reality and fiction, a place of confusion, wonder, merriment and delight. It is a very special place that cannot be fully explained, only experienced. Indeed, some argue that this thread doesn't even exist at all, and that you are not even reading these words. I believe such critics are both right and wrong. Ultimately, the truth of this thread remains shrouded in the mists of our mutual apprehension, and we understandably recoil from its alien (although undeniably beguiling) nature. But we must forge ahead through the fog of our bewilderment. We must continue our exploration and uncover the mysteries of this bizarre and beautiful place.
This thread should be renamed "Schrödingers Thread". Neither deleted, nor undeleted. No one knows for sure, because once empirically perceived or interacted with, it is no longer what it once was and has become something entirely different.
It's always weird when notorious men have younger female relatives who are attractive and yet weirdly resemble their famous male relative. Reminds me of Osama Bin Laden's niece, Noor.
I guess she's a big Trump supporter, based on what I saw while googling for pics of her.
