Cockfighting Thread

PurpleUrkel said:
Bro, you already lost. You did this to yourself. Nobody can help you now. I study ninja warrior technique on VHS for 20 years, and watch every UFC. I am a student of war who will now start to practice for 8 weeks and come to your farm. I'm pretty sure I can execute a crucifix on you as I've been watching it on TV for sometime. But your children can't watch because that's child abuse. No child should ever witness their dad pinching nipples of other men while getting choked out.
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Aha, clealry that is you where you are mistaken. I need no help from others, this fight ended before you challenged me to it.

I've honed my skills akin to a 9th degree black belt shaolin monk in the ways of bullying and this will be no different than stuffing the nerd in a locker. My simple game plan is as inevitable and incontrovertible as it is embarrassing for the recipient. Your mammaries will be sacrificed on the altar of conquest and I shall plant a boobie cactus as a shrine to commemorate the moment in my front yard.

8 weeks, that will never get you on my level. More more like 8 years...but by then it will literally become elder abuse. I've been using the Captains of Crush hand grips specifically in preparation for this altercation. If you allow me 8 more weeks with this intensity.... I will amass forearm and finger grip strength and size that would be mistaken for elephantiasis.

Child abuse? Hardly... My children will happily watch as my 19 inch neck remains unobstructed and free to draw air as you make your futile attempts to pry my icy cold hands making a vice grip like grasp off your nipples. I'm already preparing the sand pit for our engagement. We will hang Mardi Gras beads on the shrine and my wife will make a wreath of nipplewort wildflowers. Much like the laying of the wreath on the tomb of the unnamed soldier, there will be a 21 gun salute and a ceremony conducted every anniversary to commemorate the day your nipples met their maker.

***Ding***

What's this? .... My Mumbai engineer team has just ran the numbers, they have confirmed the outcome is assured and said to me "Saar, after your Nurpeling, Purple's bobs will droop to his vagene. You should prepare the celebratory feast and the 3 goats for blood money."
 
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