The NoPorn / NoFap Thread - For Those Who're Serious

This could go in many places but for me it really resonated with the struggle against lust and consumption of pornography and maybe others will find it helpful. I can clearly see how I allow sin to take a hold of me through this process.

Source: The Struggle for Virtue, Abp. Averky, Ch. 11: The Holy Fathers on Combating the Passions
The Holy Fathers teach five stages of the battle against evil and sinful thoughts

1. Initial suggestion
- A person, thing or thought suddenly appears in the mind
- May happen through senses, emotions or imagination
- A suggestion is not itself sinful because we cannot keep our mind free of thoughts
- But we must guard against the thoughts from taking root

2. Acceptance
- Entering into conversation or dialogue with the thought
- Attending to the thought as to a guest who has entered your home
- We must immediately take up arms against the sinful thought and cast it out of our consciousness
- Engage with the thought is blameless IF our response is to promptly banish it from our consciousness
- If we recognize the thought as bad or sinful but retain it in our consciousness and sympathize with it or relish it, then actual sin has begun

3. Consent
- The soul delighting in the thought or image that has entered the soul
- One begins to imagine how to act upon the suggestions of the thought that has been entertained
- Considerably sinful if the thought has been recognized as evil but through laziness or neglect, is not driven out
- At this stage the sin may only fail to be realized, if the opportunity to fulfill it does not present itself

4. Captivity
- When a soul has accepted an evil thought and is completely gripped and carried away by it
- The automatic attraction of our heart toward the sinful thought, or the constant allowance for it to dwell in ourselves
- The peaceful condition of the spirit is fundamentally disrupted at this stage

5. Passion
- The long-term and habitual delight in sinful thoughts and feelings, and the repeated committing of sin in actual deed
- Complete slavery to sin, second nature
- The sinner cannot and does not have the power to live without the constant gratification of his sinful inclination

The Holy Fathers say that he who desires to be victorious in unseen warfare must establish the following four dispositions or inclinations in his heart:

1. Never in any way rely on yourself
2. Always have in your heart complete, resolute hope in the One God
3. Work unceasingly
4. Always be in prayer

The full book contains much more advice and teachings and I highly recommend it, but this part stood out to me because I'm so guilty of entertaining and welcome those sinful thoughts in my consciousness as if they are a guest in my home, and once I do that the rest inevitably follows.
 
Iakobos said:
1. Never in any way rely on yourself
2. Always have in your heart complete, resolute hope in the One God
3. Work unceasingly
4. Always be in prayer
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Great advice, very hard to pull off - but sorta the point, the idea is practice and effort towards mastery.

I think the hardest thing in the modern day for those involved in sins of a sexual nature is the constant bombardment from the world and media, the ease with which this is done due to our constant use of technology for all things in life, but more importantly that healthy men are going to have cyclical and T based urges that are a reality of human race multiplying, or not. This is in the backdrop of largely not having any outlet for it in the appropriate sense for most in modernity (a wife).

I understand all of the other passions and why people fall into them, but this one is sneaky because it's intermittent and seems intrinsic or of course can be "good" like eating can be. It's interesting that the eating thing is largely (no pun intended) overdone by women; what makes that strange to me as a pitfall is that you get plenty of chances a day to do it and thus overdoing it seems like supreme/extra effort. Pondering all the pitfalls of life and the clear need for God as a result to me is the only answer, since so little of it "makes sense" to us fallen creatures.
 
Blade Runner said:
Great advice, very hard to pull off - but sorta the point, the idea is practice and effort towards mastery.

I think the hardest thing in the modern day for those involved in sins of a sexual nature is the constant bombardment from the world and media, the ease with which this is done due to our constant use of technology for all things in life, but more importantly that healthy men are going to have cyclical and T based urges that are a reality of human race multiplying, or not. This is in the backdrop of largely not having any outlet for it in the appropriate sense for most in modernity (a wife).

I understand all of the other passions and why people fall into them, but this one is sneaky because it's intermittent and seems intrinsic or of course can be "good" like eating can be. It's interesting that the eating thing is largely (no pun intended) overdone by women; what makes that strange to me as a pitfall is that you get plenty of chances a day to do it and thus overdoing it seems like supreme/extra effort. Pondering all the pitfalls of life and the clear need for God as a result to me is the only answer, since so little of it "makes sense" to us fallen creatures.
Click to expand...

It’s more difficult being masculine and a man in the modern world. Besides all the media messaging another example is if you are working on self improvement or maximizing yourself most likely you’ll be doing hard conditioning and weight training and maybe working a more physical job. These activities are going to boost your testosterone and in turn your lust and sexual urges.

In the olden days when society was more cohesive, you could have sex with your pure or relatively pure wife as an outlet. Therefore having several children in the process which accomplishes the Christian goal of family formation and at the same time having sex within the confines of a monogamous marriage which is spiritually healthy. This is the ideal situation.

The activities will also increase attraction from women which is another factor. Unfortunately in my experience since the level of promiscuity has skyrocketed, you will be targeted by mostly sluts and hoes, continuing the potential spiral into sinful behavior.

I have tried caloric restriction and fasting which does help a lot in reducing urges, however I feel like crap when I keep this up for too long and if you’re involved in any type of sport your performance suffers.

Again the issue goes back to the lack of purity in the modern woman and many being horrible choices for motherhood and marriage.

Obviously all women like a masculine man more than some femboy, even religious women, but again many who claim to be conservative seem to be no better. There is no vetting process in place. That Catholic women are easy has been a saying for at least my entire lifetime and the situation in religious circles has only gotten worse.
 
GrecoRoman said:
In the olden days when society was more cohesive, you could have sex with your pure or relatively pure wife as an outlet.
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Yes, whether people like it or not, and I hadn't heard any complaints til the modern day (which is telling = it's BS) this was the expectation, which goes along with what I saw posted on X recently:

"The only reason relationships exist is to make life easier for each other. Men get easier access to sex. Women get easier access to resources. That’s the deal. And then you build everything else on top of that"
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Precisely.

It is commonplace for men that are very successful, and I know many, who don't even have sex weekly with their wife. Maybe once a month or so. It's like the wife literally never thinks about the guy. And we're saying she does whatever she wants to do, sure she "raises" the kids, but the dude makes in the realm of let's just say half a million. I can't say it's every one of the people, but that that ever happens (the guy is never even remotely near a troll, and it's not like the wife is some woman in tip top shape by any means) is a tragedy in my view. This is part of the deal to love and keep your man. He doesn't get to quit work just because he doesn't "feel like it" all of a sudden.
 
Blade Runner said:
Yes, whether people like it or not, and I hadn't heard any complaints til the modern day (which is telling = it's BS) this was the expectation, which goes along with what I saw posted on X recently:



Precisely.

It is commonplace for men that are very successful, and I know many, who don't even have sex weekly with their wife. Maybe once a month or so. It's like the wife literally never thinks about the guy. And we're saying she does whatever she wants to do, sure she "raises" the kids, but the dude makes in the realm of let's just say half a million. I can't say it's every one of the people, but that that ever happens (the guy is never even remotely near a troll, and it's not like the wife is some woman in tip top shape by any means) is a tragedy in my view. This is part of the deal to love and keep your man. He doesn't get to quit work just because he doesn't "feel like it" all of a sudden.
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A lot of those guys are digging their own graves to be honest. In order to rake in that much money, you usually need to be working at least 12-hour days. And that leaves no time for your wife and family. If they just work a little less and pay a bit more attention to their wives, maybe the wives would feel warmer toward them. Being able to be happy with less material wealth is also a massive advantage in life.
 
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